The profits from that raspberry season and useful income from the new lawyer raised the bar on possible holidays that year. We could even go to Blackpool and watch the murky sea rattling in over shingle beaches and eat fish and chips from a newspaper in the howling wind. That was clearly just an unattainable dream so we downscaled to a few weeks exploring Turkey, a couple of weeks in the UK and a wrap up in the US. Round-the-world air tickets were good value that year. Turkey was amazing, UK was normal and the US, a place we had studiously avoided previously, far exceeded all expectations.
The whole holiday was fairly demanding physically and even mentally because we always travelled by the seat of our pants determining our next destinations as the journey unfolded, and used local transport, whatever that was. The final stint in Oregon was easy because we had old friends to stay with.
Maybe that was the problem; she relaxed too much in the glow of old shared memories and the catching up on years she had missed. She woke up in the night crying out in relentless excruciating pain. Her leg had seized up in a massive cramp that wasn’t a cramp. The leg was no longer hers but a useless appendage that shouted for attention remorselessly but didn’t respond to controls. We had been doing lots of walking but this was ridiculous. She couldn’t walk at all that day. She couldn’t bear to put any weight on it or have it in contact with solid things. She rang Qantas to change our flight home to as soon as possible instead of our 10-days ahead schedule. She wanted her own doctor. As we were on a special airfare we couldn’t change bookings without paying a very large sum. This rule could be dissolved if changed travel was because of a death in the family or in extenuating medical circumstances. The latter may apply here but a doctor’s certificate would be needed. A doctor’s appointment was made for the next day on the assumption she would be able to move.
The US surgery was an eye-opener. It was an expansive area with cash registers behind a safety glass wall and lots of comfortable seating occupied by lots of waiting people. There were writing tables with numerous forms. We sat down.
Several people came in after us and most went to pickup forms and fill them in. This turned out to be phase 1 of any doctor visit. We filled in the details required, more or less identifying the medical condition ourselves by ticking the right boxes. That complete and passed to a clerk we sat down to wait some more while the clerk entered the data into a computer. After around half an hour we were ushered into a small room. A woman nurse checked blood pressure and went through the form to verbally confirm our ticks and crosses. We returned to the waiting area.
The doctor was ready to see her after a further 40 minutes. The annotated form was checked through again and a diagnosis made. You seem to have strained your leg and back muscles he declared without stooping to any serious hands-on activity. I suggest you take pain killers and rest. After a few days it may clear up. However, as I don’t have your medical history, I can’t make a definitive diagnosis. Can I have a signed certificate from you that specifies I am sick and need to travel home on Qantas at the earliest date, she asked? I really am in considerable pain and distress and have never had any problems like this before.
She can be pretty persuasive but the doctor wasn’t interested in any further interaction, only in his cheque. We were dismissed to pay the required large sum through the safety glass screen. Paperwork was provided that detailed the possible diagnosis and suggested treatment, all under the letterhead of the surgery. This might be enough she said.
Indeed, it was enough. She rang Qantas again and talked to somebody different who readily agreed to change our bookings after hearing the symptoms and doctor story. No paperwork was required and no additional fee. After a couple of days we packed and went home via San Francisco. She was still having a lot of trouble with her leg, now called her bad leg.
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